Phone Calls From The Edge
by FinalArc
Summary: This was how the end came, Brock thought to himself. Waiting for nature to destroy itself while his best friend's childhood bully chattered in the background.


The whole point of working with Professor Ivy was to be there for all the important discoveries about Pokemon. Well, maybe a few other things... But Brock left his friends and travels in hopes of being on the front lines, so to speak, watching knowledge come to light with his own two eyes rather than filtered through television and scientific journals.

But he didn't protest when Ivy ran off into the weather storm that threatened to wipe out the world and left Brock behind to hold down the fort. With imminent death on the horizon, suddenly the front lines didn't seem so appealing.

Ivy's other assistants divided themselves to corral Pokemon, many of whom escaped to run straight into the epicenter of the storm, and Brock would have gone with them, but someone had to handle all the injured Pokemon who clearly wanted to make a break for it but couldn't. So he remained in the lab with the convalescing Pokemon and prayed the girls would come back safe and soon.

They didn't.

One arm cuddled a sniffling Butterfree while his other hand petted slow, trembling strokes down Vulpix's back. The television was on, and had been blaring for the past hour how this storm had the potential to wipe out the planet, and it was only getting worse. Brock forced himself to stay calm as some windows shattered in the other room. No point showing his fear in front of the Pokemon who were already scared, that wouldn't help the situation. He knew enough from raising his siblings, and from the example of his friend Ash, who could bear a grin straight through the apocalypse if there were Pokemon counting on him.

Ash and Misty were still traveling in this area. Brock hoped they'd found some shelter.

Currently, Professors Oak and Ivy were on the television, and while it was a relief to see Ivy was still alive and well, the shaky footage betrayed the danger she was still in. He listened to Professor Oak explain legendary birds and underwater currents with half an ear, the science behind the phenomena somewhat less interesting when there was nothing he could do to stop the world from ending.

Which seemed to be the underlying theme of both professors. Ivy explained the strange behavior of the Pokemon, who had all gathered as close to Shamuti Island as possible, as an instinctive desire to help, an attempt to do what they could to save their homes, even if they were never needed or called upon.

Brock wished more people were like that. But he wasn't the 'saving the world' type, more a 'fixing up sick Pokemon and comforting them while the world burned' type. Which meant he was exactly where he needed to be. Ash was more the saving the world type, even if Brock had never actually seen him 'save' more than a small village. But when disaster struck, Ash was the guy who sprang into action, Ash helped people without having to be asked, and he was first in line to do the hard things because someone needed to. If their life were a big action movie, Brock was certain Ash would play the role of the hero who sacrificed themselves with a smile on their face to save a planet of orphans.

He hoped Ash wasn't running around playing hero.

"Ring Ring Ring, Ring Ring Ring! Phone Call! Phone Call!" Vulpix protested when Brock moved to the videophone, and followed him with petulant complaints laced with genuine terror. It reminded Brock of his little siblings, scared of a nightmare. And since this nightmare was nowhere near ending, he turned on the speakerphone so he could lay aside the receiver and continue petting Vulpix. "Can I help you?"

"Brock? What are you doing here?" On the other side of the videophone, Gary Oak looked as confused as Brock felt.

"I work here. But Professor Ivy's out now." In a helicopter over a frozen tropical ocean, while three legendary birds tore the sky apart around her. "You'll have to call back later."

"Assuming there is a later," Gary muttered, and while Brock had been thinking the same thing for the past hour, hearing someone speak it out loud was too much.

"What do you want, Gary?" he ground out, ignoring Vulpix and Butterfree's whimpers, ignoring the wind howling through broken windows, ignoring the scientific breakdown of his doom on TV...

"Gramps is out there, he's on the news, and I can't get ahold of anyone, and... do you know anything useful?" His tone oscillated between frantic and condescending, a particular mix only Gary could manage. Brock really wanted to hate him, write him off as a despicable, egotistical bully, but the sincere tones to the boy's voice ensured that he never could.

"I'm clueless here, same as you are," was all he said, and Gary visibly slumped.

"This is such a mess..." But the boy on the other end of the line pulled himself together to ask, "But if you're here, Ash is with you, right? He's fine?"

Brock's breath caught in his throat. "I don't know... We're not traveling together right now." It had been over a week since Brock last spoke with Ash or Misty. They could have been anywhere, and Brock could only pray that they weren't in the middle of the ocean on Lapras when this all started going wrong.

But somehow, his gut told him they were right in the eye of the storm.

Gary seemed shocked by the news. "You're not traveling together? Why not?"

"Because we're not!" Brock shot back, the usual frustration building. Everybody always asked that, as if it was some huge betrayal to leave Ash and Misty, or a mistake. "Why would I hang around ten year-olds for the rest of my life? My world doesn't revolve around Ash!"

Except it kind of did, he being the one to facilitate the return of Brock's father, thus allowing Brock to go on a journey. And rather than travel alone, Brock followed Ash, studying the boy's unique ways of dealing with Pokemon. Brock had a dream, but no direction he wanted to go, and so trailed along in the footsteps of a little boy who knew_ exactly_ where he wanted to go, and now that Brock had a clear direction of his own, everyone acted like he shouldn't take it?

He had a life of his own, didn't he?

Gary apologized, though he didn't seem any more understanding, and Brock had to forgive that because he suspected that a good chunk of Gary's world actually did revolve around Ash. Their friend did have a way of worming himself into people's lives. "I'm just worried about everyone."

Brock could relate. "Me, too. Where are you?"

"At Grandpa's lab. Half the windows are busted and there's snow everywhere. I can't imagine what it's like in the Orange Islands."

"Not so paradisaical. We've got icicles forming on the inside of the lab, the island's pretty well snowed in, except where the ocean is lapping at our front door." And rising steadily. The flood was already leaking into the house. "I'm thinking of moving to Sinnoh."

He received a bark of laughter. "It wouldn't help you much. The weather's affecting them, too, they got a heat wave and all the snow melted. Floods all over the place." So it was inevitable. Wherever they went, the world was doomed.

"Guess I might as well stay where I am, then," Brock said with as much lightness as he could muster. "Watch all this craziness with a front-row seat."

"Might as well..." On the television behind him, Brock heard the familiar voice of a woman crying for her little boy. He whipped around to see that it was indeed Delia Ketchum, on a helicopter in the middle of Armageddon. Vulpix whined and nudged Brock's arm to resume petting and comfort, but Brock was still.

"Are you seeing this?" he hissed to Gary, who's voice got uncharacteristically quiet.

"She's looking for Ash..." And suddenly it hit Brock, very concretely without a shred of the abstract, that they were all going to die.

As if to drive the point home, one of the walls in the lab exploded, bringing down a rain of noise and plaster. Brock shielded both Butterfreee and Vulpix while Gary screamed through the videophone, but it was a couple minutes before Brock felt safe enough to raise his head, assess the damage and answer Gary's shrieked queries.

"Shut up, okay? We're fine," he grumbled, which was really more directed at himself. He pulled Butterfree and Vulpix close to his chest, gulping a little when he saw the obliterated wall behind him. "There's this metal thing... I think it's part of a boat. The wind must have slammed it into the building." Hard enough to break the structure.

"I've read that tornadoes can create such high winds that it can send a blade of hay through a tree like an arrow..."

"That's nice..." Gary continued to babble and Brock lowered himself under the computer desk, knowing that was more practical for earthquakes but not knowing what else to do. The other Pokemon still at the lab joined him, flocking to his side and creating a clump of body heat. Now that the wall was busted open, the snow and frigid air were creeping in, along with the ice water that stretched along the floor.

"I should probably shut off the power, or something..." Brock said aloud, and he thought he heard Gary's voice agree from the videophone above him, but Brock made no move to act on this, nor did Gary get off the line. Across the room, the TV showed nothing but static, white snow just like the view outside.

"Ash and I never got our battle." Gary's voice was a little tinny, but Brock felt comforted to hear it, even if the boy was not actually in the room with him, but miles away in danger of his own. "We were supposed to have a real battle at the Pokemon League, but I lost, so it never happened."

"Wait, you guys have never battled before?" It was a welcome distraction, and the more Brock thought about it, the more he realized he'd never seen a Pokemon Battle between Ash and Gary.

"Never. Always told him it was a waste of my time. He'd never beat me. Now he never will."

"We're not dead yet." But it was just a matter of time.

"I used to have dreams where the world flooded, you know. I'd be standing on a beach and this huge storm would wipe out the planet. That Pokemon I fought at the Viridian City Gym made it happen. Gramps used to tell me that it was just my subconscious trying to work some things out, deal with failure and all that. I needed to learn that losing a gym battle wasn't the end of the world."

Brock couldn't laugh aloud, but he smiled on the inside. "And how are you doing with that?"

"Getting better. I've been thinking about a lot of stuff lately..." He trailed off. "I hope Gramps is all right."

"He's a tough old guy. He'll be fine." Assuming a miracle came down from heaven and stopped this madness.

"Yeah. They'll all be fine..." And they lapsed into silence.

Eventually, the television just stopped. The screen shorted out and only dead blackness stared back at Brock. He heard a few more windows breaking on Gary's end, and the whine of an Eevee wanting comfort. The weather outside continued to rage, and a layer of slush was forming on the desk across the room. Ivy was going to kill him if she came back and found all her papers soggy.

Assuming she came back at all.

The Pokemon around Brock cried and tittered amongst themselves, and Brock tried to be a pillar of stability. He wasn't 'action' guy, but he was 'hold you close and make you better' guy, and if that was his last job, he was happy to do it. He could hold everyone's hands while the world shattered and drowned.

"You know, there's this old myth I heard about flood waters and Pokemon tears bringing all the people back to life. They say Mew has that kind of power. Ash loved legends like that, but he has a terrible memory, kept asking Gramps for the same stories over and over..."

This was how the end came. Waiting for nature to destroy itself while his best friend's childhood bully chattered in the background.

Brock decided it wasn't the worst way to go.

* * *

After the disastrous adventure in the Hale mansion, all Brock wanted to do was sleep. He hadn't gotten any since Delia had been kidnapped, but the police wanted statements and the news crew wanted stories. The sun was shining on a world of unwarped reality, but no one had any consideration for the children who'd been up for 48 hours straight now making that happen.

Ash was smart, though it surprised Brock to admit it. He very quickly played the "I'm ten, adorable and almost lost my mommy" card, and actually feigned tears at one point, so now he and Delia were both conked out on a couch somewhere and mostly left alone. Admittedly, Ash probably hadn't had to dig all that deep to find those tears, so Brock couldn't stay mad at the kid for too long. It wasn't all that long ago he was physically restraining Ash while the boy had a small breakdown.

He and Misty had no such excuses, though, which was surprising since Misty could be extraordinarily manipulative when she wanted to be. But they were too tired to think of a way out of their situation, and it was only when they began to nod off during interviews that the adults remembered these were children they were dealing with.

After that, they were showered with food, blankets, hot chocolate and comfort, and while Brock normally liked to be seen as more mature, today he was happy to be cared for and pampered. He let the adults fuss around him and was so close to finally collapsing into a nice, soft bed when the phone rang for him.

When he saw who it was, his bad mood doubled. "I'm going to murder you, Gary."

"What's happening? I've been watching the news all day, all last night, I haven't slept and nobody can get me through to Gramps-!"

"Take a break, Oak. He's on TV now." Brock looked over his shoulders to where Professor Oak was still having microphones shoved in his face. But someone had to answer the media frenzy, and better a scientist than Brock. "I can tell him to call you when they let him go."

"But is he all right? He's not hurt, is he?"

"Naw, he was at the Pokemon Center the whole time, safe and sound." The relief on Gary's face was almost endearing.

"And Ash?" The question was hesitant, almost whispered. "I saw him climbing up the side of the mansion... he's not...?"

"Ash is completely fine, and so's his mom. You can stop worrying, Gary."

"No, I can't! That's the problem!" The outburst surprised Brock, and woke him up enough to see that there were actually tears in the corners of Gary's eyes. "I can't stop, it's driving me insane!"

Part of Brock believed Gary was halfway there already, but he tried to be kind. "Try taking deep, slow breaths," he ordered, and shifted out of the way so Gary could see behind him. "Your grandpa's right there, see? Just fine." Gary did as he was told, and came down marginally from the mania, but didn't stop his rant.

"I almost lost everybody I care about, again. Gramps is always chasing discoveries no matter where they lead and Mrs. Ketchum is always on the news and I don't even want to know half the stuff Ash gets up to and I can't keep sitting here watching everyone I love die through a newscast!"

Brock let Gary continue for a bit, too tired to come up with anything useful to say. But he knew the feeling well, it wasn't such a long time ago that Ash and Misty helped save the world while Brock and Gary watched Mrs. Ketchum, Professor Oak and Professor Can't-Say-Her-Name getting blown around in a helicopter on the news.

"It never stops," Gary said without a shred of his proud tone, and actually managed to sound a little broken. "I'm always left behind and then they disappear..."

This sounded like a job for Ash or Professor Oak, maybe Delia. Not Brock. He and Gary weren't really friends, they only knew each other through following the cyclone that was Ash. Gary didn't call him up to talk through his problems, and Brock didn't seek the other boy out for a heart-to-heart.

Except for that one time... "It's going to be okay, Gary." He offered platitudes that sounded worthless to his ears, but it was the only thing he knew how to say. "We're fine now. Everyone's going to be fine."

"Until the next time Ashy-boy decides he just has to save someone," Gary muttered.

"I'm pretty sure this was a one time event..." But Gary fixed him with a look so furious that Brock stopped. "...Okay, well, would you rather he didn't help people?"

It took a second of debate, but eventually Gary shook his head. "No... he wouldn't be himself that way. Probably couldn't live with himself."

"Exactly."

"Gramps, though," Gary said with such venom that Brock couldn't help but laugh, "He's too old to play hero. Either he gives it a rest or I'm putting him in a home!"

* * *

Maybe it was the heat, but something about summer seemed to bring out the worst in the universe. Danger followed Brock and his friends everywhere they went, but summertime seemed to call out to the forces of evil and beg for a little action. Whenever danger appeared on the horizon, Ash was usually in a position to do something about it, and as they moved into the thick of summer, those dangers and accompanying heroics tended to make national news.

And eventually... "You've got to stop doing this, Gary."

"That idiot has no sense of self-preservation whatsoever!"

"How did you even know we were here?"

"Lucky guess!" Gary shot, "All of Altomare goes into lockdown? Thieves, relics, rumors of legendary Pokemon? Why wouldn't you be right in the middle of it?"

Brock had to admit, that predictability was getting to be a concern. "Well, everything's fine now." Not entirely true. Ash came back from the ordeal with a bunch of bruises, a few burns that apparently happened while ramming into an energy field, and then developed a cough and fever that had to be monitored in hopes that it wouldn't turn into pneumonia, at which point Ash felt it relevant to mention, "Oh, yeah, I guess I almost drowned a couple times..."

Really, one of these days Brock was going to string that kid up by his ears. "Do you know they have blogs devoted to you people?" Gary continued to rant. "It's ridiculous, I could track you if I wanted. #kidwithpikachu."

"You're kidding."

"#pokepocalypse." Brock sighed, but there wasn't much he could do about it.

"Well, Ash is getting over a cough, but that's not stopping him from running around. Do you want to talk to him?"

"No! Why would I want to talk to him?" And Gary began a long protest, which Brock cut off because he wasn't really in the mood.

"Of course, I forget that he's beneath you. You two aren't friends at all." He meant to be sarcastic, but the tone ended up sounding straight, and Gary's voice became quiet.

"That's not what I meant."

"I know."

"I just... It's awkward to talk to him..." Brock suspected as much. "I don't know how to make things like they were before."

How things were before was kind of a mystery, since Ash was reluctant to talk about it and Gary was reluctant to demonstrate. "Ash forgives pretty easily. You could just try."

"He got a new best friend pretty easily, too." Gary shook his head. "I've been replaced. I should just accept it."

"You haven't been repl-"

"I have," Gary said with finality. "But that's good. I wanted him to crawl and beg and be less than me, but instead of taking it, he left me behind and found someone who treats him better. That's good."

Brock can't help but chuckle at Gary's version of events. Pikachu was kind of a brat to Ash those first few months. Ash was as well, though not as deliberately. "That doesn't mean there's no room for you."

"Ash always looks forward. I'm the past. I stopped being important the second I left." It stirred a feeling in Brock, an insecurity he always tried to ignore. Someday he would stop traveling with Ash, already had once, and would he also fade into obscurity?

"Oh, like Ash doesn't think about you at least five times a day." Did he give that much thought to Brock, when the older boy was studying with Professor Don't-Think-About-It? Did Brock have such an important place in Ash's life?

And should that even matter? Why did it matter so much if Ash thought about him less someday? Shouldn't Brock have his own life and dreams to pursue, his own friends to grow with? Was he really afraid to leave because a ten-year-old might forget him?

What was Brock even doing out here? Sometimes he felt like he was stagnating, not progressing in any direction. But he was happy with his friends, so shouldn't that have been enough? "You're important to him, Gary. Both of you need to stop being idiots for a second and say so." And Brock needed to stop being an idiot and figure himself out. Even if he traveled with Ash for many more years, he couldn't stay on the same metaphorical path forever. "Are you going to be at the Pokemon League?"

"Yes."

"Good. It'll be nice to see you." Instead of getting panicked calls all the time. "You can work things out with Ash in person." Gary made a disgruntled sound that reminded Brock of his siblings. "Don't be so dramatic. None of this is half as big as the two of you make it out to be."

"Easy for you to say."

"Yes. I have more brothers and sisters than I can count on my fingers. I know how conflict works." And simple apologies went a long way. "Get over yourself, the two of you aren't dismantling a time bomb."

"Okay, fine," Gary grumbled. "Look, I gotta go. Tell Ashy-boy to quit chasing jewel thieves or I'm going to start calling him Gligar-Man."

"Noted. See you at the Silver Conference."

"Assuming he even makes it there, yeah, see you."

* * *

Brock made the call before he could stop himself, and he broke out a devilish grin once Gary's face appeared on the videophone. "So, after all your lectures about how I should call you when the big stuff goes down..."

"Shut up."

"After all your complaints that you have to find out everything important on the news..."

"Enough, Brock."

"After every time you've talked my ear off because we went and did something reckless without informing you..."

"Okay! Fine, I'm sorry!" Brock laughed at the young man's distress.

"You really brought a fossil to life?"

"Yeah, but the others did a lot of the work..." Gary outlined his new friends on Sayda island and their roles in raising up the Aerodactyl, and Brock realized how humble Gary was being. He remembered the last time he saw Gary around fossils, and back then the boy would have taken more credit than he probably deserved, while still finding a way to put Ash down over it.

He'd grown so much in such a short time. "That's an amazing discovery."

"Yeah, we're learning a lot." Gary seemed happy. A genuine smile on his face, something Brock rarely remembered seeing in their previous encounters.

"I'm glad things are going well for you. Even more glad to hear you're all right. The news article played up the danger factor quite a bit."

"All exaggerations, I'm sure," Gary laughed. "Aerodactyl isn't exactly a gentle Pokemon, but it's not flying around and attacking us, either. It's starting to get a bit boring around here, actually."

"I have trouble believing that."

"Really, I was in more danger that one time I went to Pokemon Land and some mooks blew it up." This caused a blush to rise on Brock's face, but he ignored it.

"Well, I just wanted to check in with you, Gary, and say congratulations."

"I can't take all the credit, but thanks."

"Take care of yourself."

"You, too. Stay safe." When he ended the call, Brock realized that they went the entire conversation without mentioning Ash.

It was a welcome change.

* * *

The day finally came when Brock called Gary first. The boy on the other end was stunned. "Who's dead?" What a horrible way to open.

"No one!" Currently. "I just wanted to catch up with you! Jerk," Brock added when Gary started chuckling. "Can't I call a friend and say hi?" Once it was out of his mouth, it sunk in that Gary was his friend.

Not Ash's friend, that he happened to know. His.

"Sure, just teasing. How've you been?" Through the screen, Brock watched Gary try to balance the receiver between his cheek and shoulder so he could talk, write and eat a microwaved dinner at the same time, fail at that task, and finally turn on the speakerphone with a sigh. But very little embarrassment. Gary was obviously okay with looking like an idiot for a few seconds in front of Brock.

It made his heart swell, to see that from the boy who once couldn't handle letting others see his flaws, who couldn't trust anybody to get close enough to see he wasn't perfect. But then his heart broke, because this was also the boy who called Brock up in a panic over nearly losing his friends, and this time Gary didn't call.

This time, Gary would have really had something to panic over. "I don't know what I'm doing out here," Brock blurted out, skipping over the pleasantries he'd planned on saying. Tales from the road, adventures and discoveries that would have interested the other boy, all of it was shoved away in favor of that tiny thought in Brock's mind that sometimes flickered to life when the world around him quieted down. It was better than the truly monumental news he had to share. "I mean, I like what I'm doing, but lately it all feels... I don't know."

Gary stuck a forkful of food in his mouth and chewed with thoughtful deliberation. "Like a homesick feeling?" he asked after swallowing, and Brock grimaced.

"Definitely not." He missed home, sure, but his parents were an excellent deterrent. Besides, he wasn't actually that far from home, and he'd seen his family just a week or two ago.

They probably could have seen the Tree of Beginning crumble from his house. "More like I don't want to talk about my dreams. I don't want to tell people I'm training to be a breeder."

"Something wrong with that? Pokemon breeding is a cool job."

"I know, and I like what I do, but..." It was hard to put into words. If Brock could have figured it out on his own, he wouldn't be having this conversation. "Do you think I'm wasting my time with this?"

Gary put his fork down and stared through the screen with concern. "Of course not! You're one of the most competent people I know!" His eyes narrowed. "Did some idiot insult you?"

"No!" Though it was nice to know Gary had big brother protective instincts towards him. "But I've been traveling for years, and I've got nothing to show for it." Pokemon trainers collected badges to show their progress. Coordinators had ribbons. They competed regularly and could gauge their improvement for themselves, as well as earn tangible proof of their efforts. Pokemon breeding was a little more abstract. If he hadn't come back from the most recent adventure, he'd have nothing left behind.

"Besides amazing skills, you mean." And maybe Ash's glowing praises at his funeral, though even that was debatable because the boy was being unusually tight-lipped about the whole ordeal. Brock, for once, didn't have it in him to press for details, hampered enough trying to deal with his own. Maybe Ash wouldn't have been there, maybe their eulogies would all have been handled by poor Misty. They'd just been with her days ago. If her sisters had waited a little longer to call her back, she'd have been at Cameron Palace with them...

Wasn't he supposed to protect and look out for his younger friends? That was his role in the group, so if he couldn't protect them up on that mountain, what good was he? "I don't think I'm improving. I'm worried I'm just staying out here because it's easy, or something." Gary gave that a second of thought.

"Well, are you?"

"Huh? I don't know, I..." The other boy huffed at Brock's indecision.

"What are your plans for after your journey? Open a shop? Get a job with an established business?" A simple question, but Brock floundered.

"I don't know, I can't really picture myself doing anything like that." Unless girls were involved, because he did seem to make his important life choices based solely on pheromones. Thankfully those never panned out. "But I don't know what I'd use this training for instead. I just feel stuck, but if I changed things now, then the past few years were a waste."

"Hey, I know a thing or two about changing directions. It doesn't make the first choice a waste," Gary reassured him with a bit of a laugh. "If it's important to you, it's worth your time. It makes you better at everything. You can do things for Pokemon no one else can do, and that's worth the years of traveling, even if you decided to toss it all in for something else tomorrow."

It helped to hear that. After all, Gary had been so devoted to Pokemon Mastery but was now twice as happy in his current position, and still seemed to find time enough to train for battles. He'd found his balance, he was content. "I don't know if I want to toss it all in, I just..." The real problem suddenly hit him. "Ash is better than me."

"Excuse me?" Gary looked like he didn't believe what he heard, and Brock had to give it a second thought himself.

But when he did, he found he had chosen his words correctly. "Yeah. Ash is better than me." He hadn't needed Brock for a single second in that whole debacle. In fact, though Ash had yet to admit to it, he was probably a big part of the reason they were all alive now.

There was a slow nod while Gary digested the statement. "Yeah, I know how that feels, too," he finally replied.

"It's dumb. I shouldn't be comparing myself to him, or need other people looking up to me to make me feel good about myself!"

"But your friend is growing and moving forward, while you feel left behind," Gary finished, and Brock couldn't help but give a helpless nod.

"It's so stupid."

"We've all been there. Ash, too, probably." In fact, Gary was likely the one who ensured that. "Maybe you just need to do your own thing for awhile?"

His own thing. "Yeah, but I... I can't leave."

"Why not?" No one needed him, not really. He contributed to the group, his presence was valuable, but Ash and the others were capable of functioning without him. Apparently capable of reversing death without him.

The one who needed him to stay was Brock himself. "Last time I left, Ash and Misty nearly died saving the world, or something like that." If not the most important event of their life, certainly the one most potentially life-altering. "He fulfilled prophecy, and I missed it. Could have died, and I missed it."

"I know, I was right there on the phone with you."

"I don't want to be alone while my friends are dying half a world away. I don't want to be lonely while they're off discovering the deepest mysteries of ancient Pokemon."

"I hear you, _really_, but you can't hoard everyone and everything close to you. Just like Pokemon, you can only carry six at a time and you have to choose which one you're going to let go of for a bit."

It was sound advice. But Brock just stared at his shoes. "I want to be normal again." Because as much as he didn't want to get the phone calls from Gary telling him Ash was out challenging Armageddon and he didn't want to miss the great revelations of the world, he wanted to have a normal life most of all. No criminals attacking him on a daily basis, no towns inches away from being destroyed, no wondering if it's the last time he'll see his best friends smile because the day can turn on him so quickly...

But Gary didn't look like he understood. Probably couldn't, since his whole world _was_ searching science for the unexplained mysteries and delving into the impossible, just to see if it really was impossible.

Brock took a deep breath. "I died today."

Silence.

"Really. At least, I think so. Obviously, I got cured."

More silence.

"I don't know what I'm supposed to do with my life, because half the time, I'm busy trying to keep it from ending. How can I think about my future, when any given day that future is in peril? What's the use of being a breeder or a friend if I can just get eaten by a mountain one day and leave everyone helpless?"

"What is wrong with you people?" Gary finally whispered, before hanging up and leaving Brock staring at a blank screen.

* * *

Gary called back less than five minutes later. "I'm sorry, let me get this straight, you _died?_"

"Yeah." Brock wasn't sure what else to call it. "There's this mountain near Cameron Palace, kind of close to Mount Moon, it's sort of... alive, I guess? It's called the Tree of Beginning."

"Alive?" Gary repeated in disbelief.

"Yeah, and maybe a bit sentient, we're still not sure." Ash was pretty positive. So much so, that Brock suspected he, May, Max and Kidd were not the only ones to fall victim to it. And the possible shared camaraderie of having beaten death didn't buoy Brock up like he thought it might. That Ash might also know what death tasted like made him sick.

But if he were totally honest, he had suspicions this wouldn't have been Ash's first time. At the other end of the call, Gary looked torn between laughter and sobs. "Dare I ask...?"

"Red goo, like an immune system for the tree. Mountain." Whatever. "A misunderstanding, it thought humans were a threat, so it attacked us."

After a period of silence, Gary finally choked out, "But you're all okay now, right?" and Brock nodded.

"Mostly. Pikachu's been twitchy since the whole thing ended, and Max is a little down in the dumps, but I think they'll bounce back." May was a bit over-protective of her little brother, and Ash was downright miserable over Lucario, but they seemed to be handling the events well with their loved ones by their side. Brock was a bit worried over them, but not much. "We're okay."

"Anything I can do?" It was a hesitant offer, as if Gary fully knew there wasn't much he could give.

"Nah, I'm fine. I just wanted to talk, I guess." Get some of the weight off of his chest, put some of his thoughts out there in the world where someone could hear them. As well as the others were holding up, he couldn't really throw all of this at them right now.

"Okay. Cool. Go ahead and talk, then." Poor, pale, petrified little Gary.

"What on earth am I doing out here?" Brock was useless, as a friend, as a Pokemon Breeder, in every capacity. He wasn't needed, he wasn't growing, he wasn't making an impact. He wasn't a hero.

But he couldn't leave, because he died and left Ash alone to possibly die himself, and for some reason that was killing him all over again. "Is it the sense of adventure calling, maybe?"

"Absolutely not." He could live without the adventure. Easily. "I think I'm scared of being a disappointment."

"Why do you think you would be?" If Brock was with his friends, they saw him. Worked with him. Knew all the little things, valued him, loved him. His family didn't see him, but assumed he was doing well, assumed he was succeeding, they couldn't see what he truly was, how short he may have been falling.

He wasn't sure which was better, an accurate picture of all his successes and shortcomings, or the blurred picture he could keep up in absence. Ash had already surpassed him in so many ways, sooner or later he'd realize that Brock wasn't anything special. But if he left, would Ash need to think about him at all?

"This is so confusing..." Brock ran a hand over his face and groaned. Growing up was supposed to be this fun adventure. No one mentioned that adventures were hard and came with tough choices, regrets and nightmares in the shadows.

But Gary just nodded. "I know." And he did, too. It helped a little.

* * *

Gary didn't call after the Alamos incident, which slightly surprised Brock at the time. He knew Gary was researching in the Sinnoh region, and doubted news of the occurrence could have escaped the other boy, unless his friend was buried so deep in said research that the outside world was dead to him. Brock assumed that was the case, and decided not to call Gary up and enlighten him. After all, no one was hurt, so why add to Gary's pile of nightmares? That kid had enough to worry himself over without knowing Ash chewed out a legendary Pokemon while the world around them nearly disintegrated. Plus, Ash seemed to be having residual effects from Darkrai's nightmare, which the boy adamantly denied, and Brock didn't think the kid wanted Gary to know about that trauma. At least not yet, so Brock held his tongue and let Gary remain in the dark for awhile. Their friend was probably busy, probably hadn't even heard yet.

Brock's theory was blown apart when they met Gary face to face a short week or two later, and the other boy's green eyes smouldered with a promise of death. "You could have called me for help," he said in a bit of a snit. "I was right here." Only a few miles away, able to have actually made an impact on the forces threatening his world, for a change.

It was enough to make Brock feel a little guilty, and he apologized, but the feelings evaporated once he saw Ash and Gary clinging to the underside of a jeep and chasing after Hunter J. "That was pretty reckless," he teased Gary, relishing in his chagrined face. "What happened to all those self-preservation speeches?"

"Shut up," Gary muttered.

* * *

They'd_ just_ left Gary when the incident with Giratina and Shaymin happened. Brock did consider calling him up, out of courtesy and also because rare and ancient Pokemon were kind of Gary's thing, but then they were on a train and running for their lives and meeting up became impossible. Gary wasn't so understanding when the adventure was recounted later, but dropped the usual rant in favor of hearing about other dimensions.

They saw Gary a lot these days, and Brock talked to him often. If it was a different time, years ago when Gary was a traveler like them, they might have convinced that loner boy to journey with them from town to town. It was nice to have Gary around, running into him around corners and hearing of his adventures first hand. Even the interactions between Ash and Gary were healthier than they'd ever been, certainly lacking in hurtful behavior. There was still some awkwardness and a tendency for Gary to tease and show Ash up, but Brock could tell they were both making conscious efforts not to provoke, put down or take each other too seriously.

It was helping, but there was still a small space between the two that didn't feel weird to Brock, but continuously ate at Gary. "It'll never be like it was before," Gary sighed one day. Brock didn't know what before used to look like, so he couldn't offer much understanding. "I should just get over it, but I hate knowing I could have had that." He pointed to where Ash was playing with Pikachu, the two closer and happier than Brock thought it was possible to be.

"I dunno, things are going well. Maybe someday you and Ash will have something completely new?" Gary was quiet, thinking it through, but eventually bowed his head.

His voice was tiny and broken. "I wanted _that_."

A feeling Brock knew only too well. "We all did. But only after we pushed him away." Gary gave him a questioning look. "What, you think you're the only one to hold Ash at a distance?" They'd all been guilty of the same thing. Ash was too young and immature for Brock, he wasn't about to have his best friend be a ten-year-old. They were just traveling together, Misty was just following him for the bike, Pikachu didn't really take orders from a weirdo like that. "Pikachu was the first one to give in. Ash loved all of us, but Pikachu was the first one to love him back. So he gets all the prizes."

It was hard not to be jealous of Pikachu. Brock could only imagine what Ash's other pokemon felt. And then there was Gary, who held the title of best friend and all Ash's admiration, and now sat on the sidelines and watched that friend playing blissfully with someone else.

Gary and Ash got along, but they never played.

Brock was scared to think that someday, this could be him.

* * *

As soon as Brock parted company with Ash, he wanted to break down. But he didn't, because he was supposed to be the mature one. He was the one who made the decision to leave, yet another time, the one who decided there was something more out in the world that traveling with his friend couldn't provide. If Ash, the rejected one, didn't cry, then Brock couldn't.

There was a message for him when he arrived back home. Gary. Brock called him back and broke down the second his friend picked up.

Gary didn't judge him for it. Gary was and still is the resident expert at leaving Ash behind.

The next day, Gary called him again. They talked about studying and research papers and didn't mention Ash at all.

It was relaxing, but later Brock felt guilty and insecure, so he called Pallet Town after a few days to chat with Ash. Neither of them said anything important, but it was a big deal to Brock anyway, and when he hung up, he was in a better mood than ever. He could call his two best friends whenever he wanted, he wasn't trading one for the other, he was going to be okay.

Misty called him a week later to complain that he'd been back in Kanto all that time without dropping by to see her, and that was when Brock realized that his friends wouldn't disappear just because he wasn't traveling with Ash. And maybe he didn't need to waste so many years worrying about that.

Misty understood, Gary called him an idiot, and Brock threw himself into his new studies, more at peace with himself than he'd been in months.

* * *

A postcard from Unova arrived, scribbles in every inch of available space. Ash decided to stay. Brock wasn't the least bit shocked, only a little surprised that the ache in his soul was so minor.

He wanted to explore that region, too. The call of the open road never fully muted.

But it dulled.

* * *

It wasn't like Brock thought about Ash all the time. In fact, he tried for the opposite. Because every time he got the urge to check in and see how Ash was doing, he remembered his old travels and decided he didn't really want to know.

Still, he kept in touch. And every now and again he'd follow #kidwithpikachu and see what was up in Unova, then promptly call Gary to complain. But for some reason, Unova seemed... slow. Less explosions, less Team Rocket attacks, less #pokepocalypse.

"Maybe you were the common factor?" Gary joked, and Brock hung up on him.

* * *

The Unova Pokemon League Championship had only been airing for five minutes before Gary called. Brock put the videophone on speaker and the two of them watched Ash's match together, a region apart, but chatting like they were in the same room. They reconvened for all his other matches, and cheered and dissected all of their friend's actions. In Gary's opinion, Ash had been slacking, his team exceptional but nowhere near the legendary-defeating glory he'd brought to Lily of the Valley. Brock had to agree, but he thought Ash looked happier, like he actually enjoyed Pokemon Training and it wasn't all a war of methodology and ideals. There had been days in Sinnoh where Ash seemed less like a little boy and more like a battle-weary soldier, a jaded therapist, a teacher on the brink of losing passion for the subject.

Like Brock, maybe Ash needed to get away and do his own thing for a bit.

But if anyone thought Ash's discipline was lacking, or that his team was in any way lackluster, it all disappeared in the last match. "What on earth has he done with that Pikachu?" Gary breathed, and it was such a multifaceted question that Brock couldn't answer with words.

He missed observing the answer up close. He wondered if Ash ever felt like he was stagnating, trapped, substandard, because the boy may have placed lower than the previous year, but as far as Brock and Gary were concerned, Ash was better than ever.

Brock wondered, if during all the years he felt stunted and mediocre, Ash ever looked at him the way Brock looked at him now.

There wasn't a trophy, but the was a stack of books in his room promising a challenge, and Brock felt a new surge of motivation.

* * *

Brock didn't expect the call from Gary after midnight. "Get online," the brown-haired boy demanded, and would not let up until Brock complied. "I'm going to kill him, I swear, this time I'll-"

"Oh, what has Ash done now?" #pokepocalypse struck again, apparently. Brock dragged his laptop over and typed in the address Gary gave him. "He's only been in Kalos a few hours, how much trouble could he be in?" Given Ash's track record, that was a foolish thing to ask. That kid hadn't had a peaceful start to a region since Johto, and usually his arrival was heralded by disaster warranting national news coverage.

When the page loaded, Brock saw what made Gary so upset. "Okay, yeah. I'll help you kill him."

"He jumped off a skyscraper! It's like he wants to give me a heart attack!" There was a selflessness to the act that had to be admired, but still, "How was that supposed to help?"

"I dunno, maybe he thought he could repel the concrete by sheer force of will." Though if Brock knew Ash, the boy's actual thoughts probably began and ended with 'get to Pikachu'. "I wish he'd stop running into these things with no backup."

"Can you believe how fast this thing is trending? Ugh..." Gary looked exasperated, ready to tear out his own hair. "How quickly do you think I could get a plane to Kalos?"

"Just revive an Aerodactyl and fly over."

"Oh, har de har har. Seriously, though, would it be dumb of me to just drop everything and go?" Brock's gut reaction was 'yes', but he gave his friend a little bit more thought.

"Do you mean taking a break to go chew Ash out, or actually stopping your work and moving?"

"I don't know. Maybe... the second one?" Gary was quiet, like he knew it was foolish.

"You can't base your life around Ash."

"I don't. Just... sometimes I need to know he's still there..." That, Brock understood. "People have a way of disappearing on me, it's nice to know sometimes... that you can reach out and just touch them. One town over, and you can be there."

Brock couldn't help but grin in return. "You softie. We all miss you, too." Gary huffed, but there was a smile on his face. "Just be sure you think it through before you buy the plane ticket."

"Of course. Unlike some of our friends, I look before I leap."

"Oh, I'm sure he looked. He leapt anyway."

"Which is why I'm going to fly out there and tie him to a tree." Brock grinned despite himself and replayed the videos of rampaging Pokemon, Ash jumping to his death and being caught by some variation of a Blaziken. Such a close call, they'd all been so near to losing Ash forever, and it wasn't even a doomsday type of scenario. But Ash was a friend, and therefore worth all the world. And once again, Brock was forced to sit on the sidelines and watch that world in peril, far away and powerless to do anything but wait and watch.

But history proved that was how the end would come, Brock watching helplessly while his best friend chattered in the background.

And Brock decided that wasn't the worst way to go.


End file.
